Friday, October 9, 2009

Question for Adoptive Families

First, I'm going to assume that some of the adoption folks whose blogs I follow might also read mine. Next I want to ask you a question. How did you choose your country?

I've been asked numerous times, "Why Bulgaria?" I followed up with several reasons and a gut feeling. Now, I'm not so sure. Of course, knowing myself for as long as I have, I know that it is entirely possible that God let me feel settled on Bulgaria so I could focus on fundraising. It wouldn't be the first time He focused me on something just so I wouldn't wander off somewhere in the wrong direction. Later He breaks my focus when He is ready to show me what He really wants me to have or do. (Sound familiar, Cindy?) It's kind of like having a hungry baby, but the bottle isn't ready. You give him a toy to hold his attention. When the food is ready, you take the toy (probably causing him to scream all over again like "Well, why did you give me that in the first place!") and give him the food that is finally ready for him. Does that make sense? Bottom line is I'm trying not to throw a fit saying, "But I thought You said Bulgaria!" I'm really trying to keep an open mind and open emotions to see if there is a better fit for us now that we are so close to committing. (Yes, Tim has worked on his paper work today. Yea!)

Now in the last post, I told you about a new opportunity in Costa Rica. I have yet to hear any more information about that, but I was starting to get more and more comfortable with the idea...especially the language. This week, though, I saw a picture of two sisters (ages 7 and 5) who are currently available. Perfect! The seven year-old is even still younger than Colton by 2 months. Perfect! They are in India. Whoa! I haven't really given India much thought. I had to email the agency just to find out their country and got the response very quickly. I replied right away requesting more information about them and have waited over 30 hours with no reply. I even emailed again today. No response. It's Friday now...I'm not likely to hearing anything until at least Monday. It's frustrating. Maybe they are already taken. Good for them. Confusing for me.

So now I feel like we're back at square one. Picking a country--which determines which placing agency we will use--which can affect which home study agency we choose--which could mean we are in the paperwork stage of our homestudy, or it could mean we will have to start all over with someone else.

Any advice?

Friday, October 2, 2009

A New Twist

Not a lot has happened since the last least not with the adoption. School has been crazy for Tim, and he has started co-teaching RAs at church. He is planning to hit the home study paperwork hard during Fall Break.

There is a new twist in our plan. As you know, we long ago selected Bulgaria as our chosen country. Along with that choice, we then were able to choose our placing agency which led to our choice of home study agency. Last week I received a newsletter that told about Costa Rica reopening their international adoption program. They haven't been open since 1984. I have already contacted several agencies for information, but the decision to add the Costa Rica program is so fresh, they don't have any information put together to give out yet. And what little info I'm getting has some conflicting points. For example, one agency says the travel time will be two weeks for the first trip and one week for the second trip. That's doable. But another agency says that both parents will be required to stay in the country for 1 trip that is 6 weeks long! That's a deal-breaker. The preliminary info looks like the adoption fees might be less than Bulgaria for one child, but we don't know about for two since Bulgaria is really good about more than one at a time. CR would be closer than B which would be both easier and possibly cheaper. And don't forget that CR speaks Spanish! We started studying that last year. I'm not very confident that I'd learn any Bulgarian, and it would be cool if we could communicate even a little right off the bat. The kids are adorable from both countries. Wait times for CR is uncertain so far, but it might be a little shorter than B.

The biggest problem in even considering a country change is the domino effect. The placing agency we had chosen doesn't have plans for a CR program, so we'd have to pick another. Add to that the fact that some placing agencies will require a specific home study agency (usually not the one we have started the paper work for). It seems there are so many decisions that hinge on each other. It's hard to know where to start.

If you have room on your prayer list, please pray that we will be able to push through the paperwork and make clear, decisive, and correct choices all along the way.